What made you happy this week

1. the Broadway musical Two Strangers 
   
2. Roy Lichtenstein’s cat and Rouen Cathedrals
   
3. The weather in NYC
   
4. Biking from 58th St to 149th St in Manhattan 
   
5. Seeing Peter excited about movies and just happy
   
6. Purple tips in my hair 
   
7. St John the Divine and its inclusiveness and its evolving building and the Keith Haring triptych and Christa sculpture 
   
8. Meeting smart interesting people like Jon on the plane and Ralph Cooper the comedian  and the nice genetics lady from Minnesota 
   
9. My cat comforting me 
10. 7-8 hours of sleep several times 

Protecting my energy and strength when dealing with Peter

Epiphany: When I was explaining to Hailey about how I hadn’t invited Peter to therapy yet, because he’s got all these other doctor appointments… it wasn’t about accommodating him. It’s about accommodating ME. I only have so much time and energy. It takes a lot of time and juggling to get his cardiac care moved — he’s got a stress test and a follow up in December… before that I have to make a dozen phone calls to get his old records.

And he’s possibly got hematomachrosis like Sean, — the follow up on his bloodwork is next week. 

He’s supposed to do a follow up with a dermatologist but I just let that one slide. Cause it’s nothing critical. 

His current glasses are bent and he’s dealing with them. He hasn’t asked for new glasses but I ought to get him new glasses — which is at least two appointments. 

And he needs a dental cleaning.

And he’s doing weekly physical therapy for the car accident. He had an MRI just yesterday. 

Good lord. Anyway, once the hematology appt is done and I’ve got the cardiac paperwork in hand… I can think about adding therapy. 

I started this therapy without him so that I learn how to deal with his responses in a way that doesn’t stress me out as much. So I have perfectly good reasons for not jumping in right away with Peter. 

Accommodating him and his therapy aversion is also about accommodating my energy since I’ll get the brunt of any emotional fall out. 

I need to say all this to Hailey too. I like her but I think she’s made some assumptions. Yes, we accommodate Peter too much on emotional bullshit and we are working on that. Got some good tools today. But a lot is also for my own sake. And I’m a little resentful that she jumped right to assuming my objections were only about coddling Peter’s feelings.

10 images -- or more like 8

1. Skitty completely relaxed and purring under my computer monitors 
   
2. Sean’s handsome face, grey hair, his old faded pink shirt coming to kiss me
   
3. A bright orange sunset reflected in the pond. The pond so full the area to left is just marsh. The heads and long necks of three cranes at the far end of the marsh. A Doberman gamboling happily in the berm barking at the birds.
   
4. Peter’s unshaven face. Eyes closed in the car. Relaxed and also determined. Awake earlier than he wants to be for an MRI appointment. 
   
5. Walking to the mailbox. Grass clippings on the sidewalk from neighbor who’s been away on vacation. Darkness around the mailbox so I can’t see if it says Outgoing.
   
6. Dried circles on my nails. Peeled skin. Still a bit of acrylic paint on my thumb. Two nails either white patches. 
7. The back of a black jeep that pushed to get past me when I was merging into their lane. One of their brake lights was out- which was noticeable since they stopped a lot and I had to keep slamming in my brakes. After twice if that, I kept more distance from them. So happy when they went straight when we turned on Stacy Rd.
8. The dust in the laminate floor, in the evening sunlight. Realizing the vacuum hadn’t been run all week. 

Best thrift stores Polk county

best thrift stores 

Day four in NYC

Hotel wouldn’t let me check out late. I was ready to stay in bed until the cab came for the airport. Oh well.  Packed, showered, dressed and out by 10:12.

I stayed at the Quin Hotel (a Hilton property) on west 57th street. This street was quite a hub of artists and musicians especially after Carnegie Hall was built (less than one block from the Quin) in early 20th century.

The Quin was formerly known as the Buckingham and hosted artists such as Georgia O’Keefe and Marc Chagall. Across the street is a lovely building with large bay windows — the plaque on the building (in photo) explains that artists lived and worked in these spaces, including my fave American Impressionist Childe Hassam who painted a holiday scene with flags of this street (in photo). 

The next photo shows some more buildings on the street including the one on right that has Steinway carved into the building — from a time when many music-related businesses were here. The art & antique store on left is a reminder when many prominent galleries selling current works by Picasso and other early 20th century artists.

I like the ghosts on this street. 

I am walking around New York, mostly Broadway and Times Square area. There’s a building here called the Brill building. In the late 1950s and ‘60s a lot of pop music publishers worked here; a ton of huge hits from that era came out of this building — Carole King, Burt Bacharach, Paul Anka… All sorts of talented people worked out of this building. But it faded away by end of the 60s with the British invasion and other things going on in the world. And pop music publishing moved elsewhere.

Now there’s no acknowledgment anywhere around the building that it’s anything special. There’s some other business that rents it out and a CVS downstairs. It was designated a historic landmark in the last decade, but they haven’t put up any plaque.

I took some photos of the outside and then I went to the lobby and took pictures of the absolute gorgeous elevators. The building is from the 1930s I believe and is beautiful just in its own right. I mentioned to the security guard that I was interested in it because of the famous music history. He had no idea this building had any special significance at all.

Finally bought Jon’s sardines. 

Stopped at the Ed Sullivan Theater. Said a little prayer for Stephen Colbert, who I’m sure is fine. Sorry I never got to see a show.

Had blah pizza and bought a croissant for the airport. Had nice taxi ride with a lovely man with 4 sons who spent years in Colorado. Airport was a breeze and I was at my gate more than 2 1/2 hours early. Got to chill out in reclining seat and charge my phone. 

Bye NYC. Until next time!

Day three in NYC

SO! Today I was lazy in the morning and lolled about in bed quite late— two days of walking will have that effect. I had made plans in evening  for a theater date with a friend so I had all day to myself and I did not rush. My plan: rent an ebike, make my way to to Met Cloisters museum, which is 7.4 miles away. I had a list of sites to see along the way.

In the past I’ve rented Citibikes which charge by the minute. And they have no lock or helmet. I’d have to return the bike when I got to the Cloisters or anywhere else I wanted to go inside. Then hope I can find a new bike to rent later. OR! This year, I tried a local shop that rents e-bikes. Citibike for 6 hours would cost more than $150. But at the shop I was able to rent an ebike for $90 until 6 pm — including a lock and helmet! So I saved as much as $60, while being safer and having more flexibility.

So off I went into Central Park on an e-bike and the weather was PERFECT. Absolutely phenomenal. I cannot stress enough how lovely the temperature and the park and the whole ride was. 

I went to St John the Divine Cathedral — which I adored and where I spent more than an hour (more on that separately). And I rode over to Riverside Park, and up to Grants Tomb (closed, as I knew) and Columbia University. 

At this point, I’d really enjoyed the biking. And I was less eager to go into a museum. I know the Cloisters is lovely and is in a park that would be nice in this perfect weather. But it was another half hour more plus then time at the museum and then an hour plus back south and I worried I’d be so tired and stressed on the ride back.

Instead I rode over to see the outside of Alexander Hamilton’s house (also closed). Then I rode to see the church led by the father of Michael Forsyth’s dad for 30+ years. 

Next I discovered Santa Claus St (aka St Nicholas Ave) runs straight through Harlem! And then over to the Apollo Theater — which doesn’t seem quite so edgy now with a Gap across the street and a Banana Reouvlic next door. Of course, a white woman doing a self guided Ebike tour of Harlem also  suggests it’s not as dangerous as once considered.

And finally at 4:00, I finallly stopped for “lunch” at Melba’s for soul food. The mac & cheese was literally to die for. It’s true — it was way better than white people mac & cheese. 

Then I rode back to the bike store, arriving at 5:55. Got my moneys worth out of that bike! 

Google Maps says I did just over 12 miles, but there was some back and forthing. And this ebike wasn’t as easy to ride as my bike at home, and those north Central Park hills — hoo whee. I definitely got a great work out.

I saw so many neat old brownstones and buildings and took photos of barely anything. I only got honked at once, so I think I was a good NYC bike citizen. 

Evening:

I felt like I was perhaps settling for my 3rd show to see an intimate rom com called Two Strangers: (Carry A Cake Across NY).  And yet, … I LOVED it. The two actors were fantastic, the set was clever, the story was unexpected, and many genuine laughs. 

And I got to see it with my pal Phyllis Jo. And we made a friend from Minneapolis. Though we never got her name. 

Day two in NYC

Things I did today instead of doom scrolling:

1. Stopped at Tiffany jewelers, but did not have breakfast
   
2. Took photos of Art Deco decorations on NYC buildings
   
3. Hailed a cab successfully
   
4. Learned about and admired Roy Lichtenstein’s art
   
5. Blissed out on Whitney Art Museum’s 5th floor terrace, overlooking Highline park
6. Inspired to make notes of art projects to do
7. Deleted phone game I’d been playing obsessively and had started spending $$ on which I’d promised myself I wouldn’t
   
8. Walked through Greenwich Village
   
9. Said prayer for LGBTQ+ community at Stonewall
   
10. Ate a perfect grilled cheese sandwich
    
11. Bought more fancy chocolates
    
12. Researched cool buildings and cool street makes I saw   
    
13. Blissed out on a PERFECT autumn day in Washington Square Park with NYU students, a jazz trio, artists, freaks, Hare Krishnas and pigeon
14. Resisted telling college kids around me: ENJOY THIS. It will never get better than a perfect autumn day in a park laughing with your friends. It can be as good, but it’ll never be better. 

After taking this photo and starting to head out under the arch, I spoke with the artist at that table. And I bought a piece for Peter. 

Part 2:

Gratitude Oct 19

I am grateful for changing plans, the internet, cute welcoming restaurants, beef sandwiches and Beaujolais wine, and comedy legends.

SO! I made plans yesterday that today I’d go to a particular slightly expensive restaurant, Monkey Bar. I’d read reviews of their $40 prime rib French dip and figured I’d splurge. The glasses of wine start at $20. (Justified after “saving” $40,390 yesterday! 😜😃)

But then this afternoon I was just so relaxed at Washington Square and stayed longer than planned, and then rush hour taxi ride took longer too. So I scratched that idea and just went to my hotel. 

So I was chilling in my room, thinking about my plans to go to Carnegie Hall across the street at 7:30, but I thought I really *need* to eat something first. Looked at restaurants around hotel/Carnegie hall… found a cute little French place around the corner… which lo and behold… has a French dip (doesn’t mention if it’s prime rib…), and it’s $27 and the wine is $10. 

So this time, I saved $23… 😃 Which is good since I spent $111 to go to see John Oliver, Josh Johnson, mary beth barone, Roy Wood Jr and others at Comic Relief at Carnegie!

NEXT

On the elevator at Carnegie Hall, this tall black man behind me speaks. And I said, I could believe you were Roy Wood Jr if you told me you were. Sounded like him mostly. He laughed and said in fact he did a podcast with Roy for years. 

Huh!

So I looked him up. His name is Ralph Cooper III. And then I messaged him via Instagram which is cringe, but whatever. Also, after seeing Roy Wood Jr at the comedy gig… the two do NOT sound alike. What was I thinking. 

EDITED TO ADD: and he wrote me back and thanked me and now we follow each other.